Melissa Heckscher > Staff Writer

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Intimidated by the prospect of taking tea? Cynthia Sperry of the SoCal SocieTEA, a group of tea aficionados, offers some etiquette tips to help you feel more comfortable at the table.

 

>How to eat a scone: Break off small pieces at a time and add a dollop of topping (cream, jam, butter). "If you cut it in half and slathered the whole thing, some chunk could fall off and you'd get goo all over you," Sperry says. "Etiquette is about preventing accidents."

>How to stir your tea: Don't clink. Sperry recommends using figure-8 movements to lightly swish your tea.

>How to hold your cup and saucer: You don't have to lift the saucer at the same time as your cup unless you're sitting far away from the table, in which case, the saucer would catch spills. "It's about being practical, not prim and proper."

>About your elbows ... Believe it or not, it's OK to have them on the table ... sometimes. For example, when you're in between courses and when you're finished with your meal and your food has been removed, elbows are fair game.

>... And your fingers: Afternoon tea is meant to be a feast of finger foods. However, if something has a "goo factor," it's always best to use a fork, Sperry says.

>Lipstick blunders: If you're wearing lipstick, blot it before you drink the tea. Not only does it look funny on the cup, but it can damage very fine china.

>Got milk: Apparently, there's a big brouhaha over whether you should put milk in before or after you pour the tea. Sperry says before. "When you are dealing with very fine china, you should put the milk in first. Otherwise, if you pour your hot tea in, it's going to crack the cup."

>Dress code DON'Ts: You do not need to wear a bonnet or a boa when you have tea. "That idea is so American," Sperry says. "You really think the queen of England is wearing a boa when she has tea? I don't think so."