BY DAVID KRONKE >TV CRITIC

Here's a conundrum: When "Dancing With the Stars" upgrades its roster from perennial B- and C-listers and People Who Were Famous Long Ago to former A-listers and People Who Were Successful Not So Long Ago, does that make the show more exciting or more depressingly pathetic?

The show returns March 17. ABC announced the participants Tuesday on "Good Morning America." Chances are good you've not only heard of some of them but have seen them in action and perhaps even remember them fondly.

Among the participants:

Marlee Matlin, who won an Oscar for "Children of a Lesser God" in the '80s and has since appeared in recurring roles in NBC's "The West Wing" and "My Name Is Earl." Matlin, of course, is deaf: How can she dance to music she can't hear?

Monica Seles, who was once the top-ranked women's tennis player in the world.

Steve Guttenberg, who starred in a dozen movie blockbusters, including "Three Men and a Baby" and the "Police Academy" series and was once considered by some to be pretty funny.

Penn Jillette, the once-edgy comic/

magician who heretofore had devoted his life to, on Showtime, calling out "Bullsh!t" in others.

Marissa Jaret Winokur, who won a Tony for her role in the Broadway production of "Hairspray."

Jason Taylor, Miami Dolphins defensive end, who was this year's NFL Man of the Year and last year's Defensive Player of the Year. (Didn't he see what flouncy costumes they made Emmitt Smith wear?)

Priscilla Presley, who was married to Elvis and starred in those "Naked Gun" movies.

Shannon Elizabeth, who starred in "American Pie" and has inspired vast numbers of young men of a certain skill set to download provocative images of her from a vast online database.

Mario, a platinum-selling artist who just two years ago won Billboard magazine's award for Top R&B/hip-hop single of the year.

Kristi Yamaguchi, an Olympic gold medalist in figure skating.

Adam Carolla, pal of Jimmy Kimmel/co-creator of "The Man Show," host of random cable shows and a uniquely crude syndicated morning radio program, and the first guy who actually makes a lot of sense being on this list.

Cristian de la Fuente, telenovela star named by People magazine as one of its "50 Most Beautiful," and the second guy who actually makes a lot of sense being on this list.

Maybe it's just me, but when people who appeared on these "celebrity" "reality" shows were those who populated the fringes of celebrity arcana, the trend was good for a laugh in that Schadenfreude kind of way. But when people who actually had real careers (or, in one way or another, still do) turn up on these shows, it's kind of disquieting: It suggests that this current economic downturn is worse than we ever imagined.

KITT kills

NBC's "Knight Rider" TV movie on Sunday (with Justin Bruening filling out David Hasselhoff's bucket seat) paved the way for – gulp- a series next fall. It averaged 12.7 million viewers and built in viewership each half hour. (NBC didn't send me a screener, or perhaps it got lost in the mail - insert muted tone of disappointment that's actually relief here.) Of course, we know how well revamping "Bionic Woman" fared as a new show.

NBC probably wasted its "American Gladiators" finale by airing it earlier on Sunday. It posted its lowest ratings of the season, though NBC would prefer to focus on the fact that it posted the highest ratings in that time slot since the end of the football season.

And CBS' "Dexter" redux did OK-ish, for what was essentially a repeat: 8.2 million, though it was beaten by "Knight Rider" and a new episode of "Brothers & Sisters." There's a crossover I wouldn't mind seeing: Dexter taking on the upscale whiners of "B&S."

`America's Next Top' squeal-a-thon

"America's Next Top Model" returns for its 10th cycle (8 tonight, The CW), and the premiere boasts a silly conceit: The aspirants are dressed in schoolgirl costumes and attend "Top Model Prep School." As usual, they squeal endlessly, and beyond all rational proportion, every time one of the judges appears on scene.

And amid its catfights and teary meltdowns, the show attempts to shoehorn in a serious subject: One of the contestants was born in Somalia, and was forced to undergo female circumcision at an early age. While this is certainly a topic worthy of discussion, I'm not sure the deliriously frivolous "ANTM" is the proper forum to analyze it fully.

But you be the judge. Here's a random collection of lines from the show's contestants. See if you think sober discussions of genital mutilation rest comfortably around this other dialogue:

"I like to create beauty because I am beautiful."

"A lot of my friends think that I'm very weird, but in a positive way."

"I am ready to annihilate the competition."

"I had to take an hour just to breathe – not an hour, but you know what I mean."

"Most of the girls are cool, but I don't think they understand how stupid they are sometimes."